You were never just the reason why I share them. Still, I have always anticipated the times when you finally get to hear them.

In many ways it was because of you that I tell so much detail in most tales I shared. I didn't care if I'd be pathetic to others. I shouted them in public just so you can hear them, just so you know what I felt, what I did everyday. Just so you know, without me telling it to you directly. Because I cannot tell everything when we were alone. Time always wasn't enough. And my power to express seemed useless most of the time. Only through stories was I able to be with you everyday. Not that you wanted it but I wanted it that way anyway. It was my way to make you feel I am always here. It didn't even matter if you leave before each tale was over. You dropping by to eavesdrop was enough for me. At least you know I wasn't far away.

Also, you were the reason why I tell codes. And you were the reason why I didn't elaborate most of the time I was asked to. Not even when it was you who kept asking. In 2005 I wrote this: "I'd like to tell more but I'm afraid I'll write too much. Besides, I believe what I've written will be enough. She alone can fill in the unwritten details and only she is meant to understand. Cause if she doesn't then there is no point in telling more." I said that for one story alone. But for you, I would have to say that a thousand times.

But not anymore. You will never get to hear this story and every story that will follow. Unless of course if you intentionally drop by. Which I know you won't. Because I know the many times you dropped by to eavesdrop happened out of curiousity. Now nothing in your inbox will tell you that I do have another tale.

Which, I must admit, makes me sad. No longer will you be among those who will gather just to listen. Of course, I was always grateful to all who took time to be part of my audience. But always, it was your face who I first looked for among the crowd. Their number, no matter how big, was not sufficient without you among them. Better to have one listening alone as long as it's you.

And without you... well, for a while I thought I should stop telling. But then I remember my first line here. "You were never just the reason why I share (stories)" And though I won't have the "times when you finally get to hear them" to anticipate, I know the story-telling must go on.

Because stories never end. Mine won't.